Of course I would beg to differ only because I am the one that would be left paying for everything and would end up broke.  But over this week of celebration I saw her have a great time and I just sat back and watched how everyone seem to do to make the feel good.

What truly makes people have a good time?

As I enjoyed the festivities of my wife’s weeklong celebration of reverse aging I noticed something that was very scary.  It seemed as though everyone who was having a great time was consistently eating and eating and then eating some more.  I added up all the calories I thought one of her friends consumed in just one day and I swear it was about 3000-4000 calories easily and that didn’t include beverages.

I wondered if they were just having a good time because of the food and drinks or because of the people.  It was truly hard to figure out but I really understood more this week why so many people tend to gain weight and not understand why.

Birthday was great but the weekend didn’t end so well

Well my wife had a great time celebrating her 25^th birthday (reverse aging lol) with the family, friends and co-workers but things weren’t all great.  I had mentioned in a previous post that my wife and I were trying to have a baby and recently we discovered she might be pregnant so she scheduled a visit to her doctor.

However over the weekend she noticed that she was bleeding and though she is pregnant we don’t really know what to expect, as her bleeding could be a sign for a miscarriage.  She is just heartbroken at the moment but right now we just aren’t sure what is going to happen.

Well Try to Keep you Updated with Info

I will do my best to keep everyone updated and continue to post.  I made a promise to update and post with at least two posts per week so I still expect to be held to my word.  Hopefully I will have some good news on the next post.

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The dilemma was that it had already been hard for my wife to lose the last 15-20lbs.  She still hates her thighs even though she has lost over 40+ plus over the last few years.  Well now she is caught between wanted to get those last few pounds out of the way and getting pregnant.

Really I don’t Know How to Answer This

She asked me a few times what I think she should do?  Well to be honest I know what I would do and what I WANT to say but its tough.  I have lived with my wife through the ups and downs of her weight but know how much getting pregnant means to her.

I feel as though she is so close to getting to her goal weight that a few more months would be worth it.  Then I think of how see looks at little babies and how happy she is when she is around her nephews and nieces.   Its easy for me to say just lose the weight and wait but then how long will it really take her to lose the 20lbs.  Not to mention no sooner then she loses it she will be putting it back on.

This Really Sucks but is a Great Situation

Yeah this really sucks if you have to help make a decision because I feel like if I say one thing I wont be being honest however if I say wait on getting pregnant and having a baby she might think am just selfish.  On the other hand it’s a great situation for the both of us.

If she decides to go after her goal and lose the last few pounds she gets the body she has always wanted (I will be happy too) and on the other hand we will be looking forward to having our on little bundle of joy (of course I will be even more happier).

What do you think is the best thing to do?  Would you go with just putting off having a child now and losing the last few pounds or would you just wait on the weight and try to have a baby and lose the weight afterwards?

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• lost person

I know, people are going to say something like but if he love her and all this stuff but I am not here to take sides.  The truth is he wasn’t the one who was complaining about the weight, SHE WAS!! The problem he has is that not only has she been complaining she hasn’t done anything to change the situation.

Why My Friend Never Said Anything Before

Well, truth be told both of them gained weight since they first met and I mean a lot of weight.  Of the years they both kind of just let themselves go and just made excuses for the gain. From being too busy to not having the money for gym memberships.

Eating out and eating out a lot caused them both to easily be 30-60lbs overweight.  At one point it seemed at though they both had accepted who they had become.  It was a similar situation as the one I experienced with my wife.

But Something Changed and Things Got Worse

What could make to people who love each, gained weight together, and are fighting over nothing become worse?  Well, how about when one person starts to lose weight and the other one doesn’t.  Talk about issues and long decisions about nothing that wont change.

My friend says that now more then ever they are consistently arguing about things and it seems to always go be to something about weight gain.  Whether its not going out to eat as much, needed clothes because he’s getting smaller and she’s getting larger to even her being less secure about the relationship because now she thinks he might cheat on her.

He’s stressed and its Killing them Both

He doesn’t know what to do at this point, he really loves this woman but he’s not happy.  The sad part is that he feels that it’s his fault and since they both gained weight and he feels that he is responsible for her gaining weight.  He has almost put the weight gain for the both of them on his shoulders and its weighing him down big time.

Should he stick around and try to make it work or should he cut his losses and stop trying to get her to do something she isn’t ready or willing to do.  This as gone on for almost three years now and I don’t know if its going to get any better.

So what do you think he should do and how should they both handle this particular situation?  What would you do if you were the boyfriend?  What would you expect if you are the girlfriend?

So as far as me being missing in action for a couple of months here is the short run down of things that went on.  My son’s birthday was in June so there was planning for that along with looking for a new jobs which I currently work at.  Of course with looking for a new job we had to make plans for how my son was going to spend summer break and then came father’s day.

Along Came the Fourth of July…Fireworks

Well unlike everyone else who celebrates the 4^th I tend to do it a little bit different.  You see for the country the 4^th of July is a way to celebrate Independence Day but for my brother and I it’s our birthday.  So July became a busy month in planning for trips and having a nice party for the two of us.  NO we aren’t twins he was just born on my birthday and I guess you can say he was the biggest present I have gotten so far.

August Just Seemed to Fly By…No sure What happened

August was just one of those months that I really don’t remember much of what happened.  It came and went and to be honest all I remember is putting in my two weeks notice at my old job and my son starting middle school.  Other than that the month was a blur.

Sin City in September…A Few Friends and I Did Vegas for Labor Weekend

A couple of my close friends and I went to Vegas and partied like there was no tomorrow.  I think there should be a law against the amounts of alcohol we drank while we were there.  We arrived on Thursday and from that point on it was not stop fun.  Eating, drinking, partying, and we sleep whenever we could (not much sleep happened though).

We Decided We Should Have a Little One

And of course the biggest thing that happened while I was away from blogging was that my wife and I decided to have a baby.  Well we want to try so that before the end of the year she is actually pregnant.  This one what most of my time spent on which was focusing on what we need to do and how we need to plan.  More about that in a later post and more about our upcoming trip as well.  Of course we will always talk about weight loss and diets.  Until later enjoy your week.

Ok well there’s no excuse I just haven’t written on my site for almost six months just because I didn’t make time for it.  To be honest for a minute I got tired of updating and dealing with all the spam I was getting.

I don’t think I have updated my site since June…hmmm let me think?   Yeah it was June because I didn’t even say Happy Father’s day to anyone on the site.  Well while I was away a lot of great things have been happening.  I got a new job, my son starting playing acoustic guitar, I went to Las Vegas for a week, and my wife and I decided that this year we are planning to have our first child together.

Things won’t be the Same as they Were

Yes the blog well still focus on weight loss for women, you will still get up dates on how my wife is doing and what programs she is using I will also still update with pictures of her and us from time to time.  The changes will be that I plan to be a little more personal so that people know that I am a real person, I am married to a loving women, have a great son, and though I try to help my wife with her weight loss there is always a road block from time to time.

The great new is that I will also be updating more regularly and giving you shorter post so that you can read the without fearing a 700 word post to drive you insane.  This site is for the ladies though it’s being written from a husband’s point of view.  Remember guys you have to give you input as well be our girl friend or wife needs to understand how we feel as well.  Remember if she goes through it you go through so it’s best to make it as painless as possible.

Come back soon And I will have a post about the BABY!!!!

Yeah we are planning to have a baby…ok working it anyways.  But I want to let you in on some of the discussions and concerns both my wife and I have had and hopefully to get some input from YOU.  Look forward to being back!!!!

You know, I knew better but when you start hearing something over and over again you start to believe it even when you shouldn’t.

It all started just before we were engaged and my wife (girlfriend at the time) was starting to put on some weight.  At first things were cool because she could still fit into her clothes and will no one else had made one of those crazy comments like “when is the baby due or OMG your pregnant”.  That all changed in a matter of weeks though.

The clothes that went from fitting correctly to fitting a little snug where now it was just simply un-wearable. No matter what no one was making any statements and all of her girlfriends told her she look great and there wasn’t anything to worry about (most of them gaining weight themselves).

They told her it was the process of her getting older and now having a future husband that she cooks for.  It happens to all of them and they kind of just believed it.

Three months went by and my wife went from being around 125lbs to 145lbs and it was all downhill from there. Unlike myself when I gained weight in the past I would be quick to try to lose it to get back to my ideal weight my wife was the complete opposite.  The weight only went upwards from there and the problems really started.

One evening after work I can remember my wife coming home and she was just unhappy.  The conversation went immediately on everything else but I knew that it was the weight that was causing the problem.

I don’t like beating around the bush so I just came out and said, “You are just unhappy because you are getting fat!” Big mistake!  All hell broke loose in that house and amazingly everything was aimed at me.

From me having too much junk food in the house to her having to cook, as being the reason she was gaining weight in the first place.  “Everyone else tells me how great I look and you just say stop eating this or that! It’s your fault you should be more supportive and love me for who I am!” (ooooouch that hurts even to write).  This went on for months to the point that I was getting blame for everything, nothing was her fault.

The thing is though she went out to lunch every day, went to dinner once or twice a week, was eating dinner at home every night, ate breakfast and grabbed fast foods and most of all was not active.

You see these weren’t things that I caused but rather her life had completely changed.  She was no longer in college so she wasn’t as active as she used to be.  She was working the 8-6 instead of going to classes and now was getting breakfast at work and going to lunch almost every day.

See these were the changes that were causing her to gain the weight NOT me!  It wasn’t the fact that I ate too much but the fact that she didn’t want to blame herself or situation for getting fat.  And her friends didn’t see anything wrong with it because guess what, they were getting fat as well.

Her weight gain wasn’t may fault at all but since it occurred when WE became one in her eyes I caused it.  It didn’t matter that I stopped having with all the snacks in the house, stopped going out to get fast food, or even started working out and running with her.  Why because she didn’t lose weight and those weren’t the actual problems to begin with.

The problems were the things that she had control of and things she had to change on her own.  It wouldn’t be until she realized that she needed to make a change in herself and be accountable that things would change for the better.  It wouldn’t change until she understood that eating out every day at lunch and going out for drinks and dinner with the girls can cause rapid weight gain.

HER WEIGHT GAIN WAS HER FAULT NOT MINE!

Of course most people already know the benefits that losing weight can have on a person’s health but in what other ways does it make a difference? 

Here are some photos my wife took while she was up in New York City!  There are a lot more photos then I would care to look at but this woman loves taking pictures.

Losing Weight Makes You Feel More Confident

It’s amazing to see the transformation over my wife’s weight and confidence over the past few years.  There were so many things she would have never attempted just a couple of years ago.  Things like the rock climbing wall here at Boomers to going to the gym and working out around other people.  She hated people seeing her struggle.

She no longer walks around with her ahead down hoping that the eyes are not on her because of the weight that she was carrying.  Instead she welcomes all looks and questions because she is confident in herself and the way she looks.

Everything Just Seems to Fit Properly

Almost Gone are the days of never wanting to go anywhere because she had nothing to wear.  The days of “I can’t wear this because it’s gotten too small or doesn’t fit right” are not as big a deal as they once were.  Now it seems as though the clothes were made for her and she simply loves it.

No more buying something knowing she would have to take it to a seamstress to get it altered. Yes there are the occasional “this fits my waist but it’s too tight on my thighs”, but trust me, both my wife and I will happily live with this.

To Me  She Just Seems Happy All the Time

Before my wife starting losing weight she looked unhappy all the damn time. It was like someone had permanently placed a rain cloud over her and it was just a thunderstorm every day.  From the time she woke up I could just see it on her face.  Her weight was just killing her.  She dreaded waking up to only have to go to the closet and find something to wear to work.

Now it’s a completely different story!  (Well the whole clothing thing that is.  She still hates having to get up but it’s more because she’s not a morning person.)

Now getting up brings a new day, a great outfit to wear, no more worrying about the scale, something not fitting or seeing herself in the mirror and being disgusted.  The woman I feel in love with so long ago is smiling more and is happy again.

It’s amazing that for so long I thought there was something I did wrong or could do to help her.  Buying her sunglasses, purses, nice heels, going on vacations, and going out to eat weren’t the solution.  Telling her I love her made her happy for the moment, but she wasn’t happy with herself and it was mostly because of her weight.

Some People Just Don’t Get It

People will tell you that you shouldn’t let your weight affect you!  To them I say it’s easier said than done.  Some will say it doesn’t bother them and that’s the same thing my wife SAID but her actions proved otherwise.

You see losing weight does make a difference, a big difference.  Not just for health reasons (which should be #1) but for others as well such as how you look, how you feel, the confidence you have, and how most importantly you feel about yourself.

There is one thing that I know for sure and that’s the fact that my wife is a happier woman now than she was when she was almost 40lbs heavier.  Our marriage is better because of her weight loss!  To be honest she’s just easier to deal and communicate with. 

No longer is everything a struggle or battle. Just seeing a smile on her face is enough for me to know that losing weight really does make a difference.

How about you?  Has losing weight made a difference to you or someone else in your life? Do you think losing weight would make a difference to you?

That college would also be the first part of my wife’s story on the up and down of weight gain.  You see when people talk about the freshmen 15-20 (gaining pounds freshmen) a lot seem to think or take it as a joke.  All I have to say is go ask my wife about it and see if she thinks it’s a myth.

Being Active is Only Half the Battle

You know how people will tell you that you just need to be active, do more exercise, going to the gym and stuff like that?  Well to be honest that ISH isn’t going to work miracles by itself!  My wife was as active as a person could be. Walking to class, going to the gym, being a part of her sorority, and going to parties every weekend, she was very active.

She was so active that she never really paid attention to the garbage she was eating and how unhealthy her eating habits were.  Of course being active help but it couldn’t stop her from gaining the pounds freshmen year of college.

You Can’t Out Exercise a Bad Diet

If you are new to my site then you probably have never read the statement above but it holds to be so very true.  My wife didn’t sit on her ass on all the time like most but what she was eating was killing her and her self esteem.

From the $.50 hot wings and pizza slices from Five Star pizza to the late night drinking at parties and the fast food restaurants on the late nights coming from the clubs.  The calories were just too much for her body to burn.  Sure she was active but there isn’t enough dancing in the world that’s going to cover with a high calorie diet.

It’s Not About How Much Eat

Too many women are under the assumption that since they only ate a little bit (as my wife would say) that they shouldn’t be consuming a lot of calories.  Well take a look at the calories in a meal from your favorite fast food place and then tell me if that is true.  Those meals won’t usually fill you up but they sure do pack on the calories.

Before there was intermittent fasting and high intensity interval training for my wife there was a clear understanding that to lose weight she needed both exercise and a great diet.  She finally figured this out her sophomore year in college and the fat started to slowly disappear.  She was starting to get her life back and was happy again.

But then something happened that caused things to change……………that’s a whole other story.

NOTE: Let me know how you feel….Have you tried losing weight but just can’t seem to get it right?  What are you doing wrong?  What do you need help with?  Leave a comment or question that’s what I am here for.

Be Easy

-Thomas

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This was a great break for the both of us as we needed a break from our busy lives.  With her working more hours then she cares too and me working full-time and running this site we tend to be very busy.  It was great to unwind, relax and not have to worry about anything for a couple of days.

Are You Really Enjoying Life?

This is a question I ask because I remember a few years ago it seemed as though nothing my wife did made her “happy”.  Being a man, she said I just didn’t understand where she was coming from.  I was lost I didn’t understand if we were going on vacations, she was spending time with her girlfriends, and getting promoted at her job how she couldn’t be happy.

My wife was sick of how her body looked and how it made her feel.  It didn’t matter how beautiful I told her she looked in the inside it was killing her.  She hated her wide hips and thighs simply because nothing she bought ever seemed to fit and how nothing see did seemed to change her shape.

If she found clothing that fit her thighs and hips they were too big in the waist or the clothing just didn’t fit right at all.  She would spend hours in the gym, go running 5 times a week and still there was no change.   She felt miserable to say the least.

Those Where The Days

Gone are the days (not all of them) of my wife being upset with how she looked.  She has been able to make drastic changes in her appearance and she is enjoying life to the fullest.  It’s amazing how something like losing weight can have such an effect on a person.

She doesn’t have to worry about starving herself and enjoys eating all the foods she used to eat before.  The difference now is that she has found a diet (read here) that works for her so she doesn’t feel like the odd ball when she goes out.  She no longer spends hours in the gym doing cardio only to not see any results.  Three times per week she does her turbulence training and in 20-30mins tops she’s done.

The weight has continuously come off and she is looking and feeling as beautiful and confident as ever.  No her hips and thighs are not completely where she wants them but she knows what works for her and each week she is seeing continuous improvement.

This was a photo I took from the room window on Memorial Day.  The horizon and sunrise reminds me of a new beginning for my wife, myself and this site.  What gives you a sense of a new beginning?

This Weekend Was A Simple Reminder

For me it was a simple reminder of how far my wife had come over the years.  The fear of going to the beach, wearing a bikini, going shopping or simply wearing a particular dress that made her insecure are almost completely gone.  Not only is she losing weight but she’s happy, which is the most important thing of all!

She has found a balance in life that allows her to not have to kill herself in the gym, spend long hours doing cardio and most of all gives her results.  Life shouldn’t be just about losing weight but its amazing how losing weight allows some people to actually live life.

Find your balance and enjoy life!

Be easy,

-Thomas

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• woman shape body

Then enters my wife who is the love of my life (most of the time) pictured above.  Like I mentioned in the previous post she read over a few articles and was like O-M-G.  (Read that post here) So I did a little soul searching and decided that I would change my blog to what is should have been in the first place.

What am I Changing Here?

Well for one thing I actually have a story to tell that shows I know what you are going through and that I can actually help you get where you want to be.  You see that lovely women pictured above with all the smiles wasn’t always a happy camper!  Of course when she’s not happy my life is miserable needless to say.

Over the years I have seen my wife’s weight go up and down and all around.  I have shared with her successes and been there when she needed someone to push her harder.  Using a couple of simple approaches (three to be exact) I was able to help my wife go from the pictures below to the pictures you see above.

The pictures above were of my wife in 2008 when she let WORK, being a WIFE and LIFE in general take its toll on her body.  She didn’t know what to do and to her it seemed like the world was on her shoulders.  Of course I was there complaining saying that she wasn’t working hard enough to lose weight but the fact was she was working too hard.  Actually too hard doing all the WRONG things!

My wife had a problem of jumping from one diet to the next and the same with exercise routines.  If she didn’t see results quick enough she would think it was a waste of time.  Another issue is that she is a people person so she enjoys doing what all her girlfriends are doing.

The biggest problem with doing what everyone else is doing is that a lot of times no one gets results but you stick it out because you are all are there to support one another.  After not losing weight for months on end my wife was finally ready to listen to me!

Can you believe my wife was actually willing to listen to me?

What I will be doing here on Waist Hips & Thighs is sharing with you the story of how using Eat Stop Eat, Turbulence Training, and now Visual Impact for Women (her current workout) I was able to help transform my wife’s body.

NOTE: Remember ladies losing weight is a process!  It’s not easy and if it was every woman would have the body they desired.  As for my wife she still feels she has a long way to go but I know if she continues using these three programs she will get there.

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